I’m a math guy.  Not that I’m into numerology, but I find it interesting that certain numbers stick in our brains.  Numbers like 9/11, or 12/7/1941, or 411, or 8675309.  Like smells and songs they evoke vivid memories and remind us of things we don’t want to forget.  My mom can still rattle off my dad’s military service number (and it’s not his SSAN) even though it hasn’t had any useful purpose for nearly 60 years!  There’s a new number I’ve burned into my psyche and it’s 405.

405 is the number of days from the original FSA (Force Structure Announcement) last year to the announcement that the 911th Airlift Wing was not closing.  I know it doesn’t mean much to a lot of you, but to those who suffered through 405 days of uncertainty and stress it seemed like a lifetime.  Especially since it was generated by lies and incompetence.  There’s an old saying which I know you all have heard; “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned”.  Well, there’s a much more dangerous version; “Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat denied”.

What makes bureaucracies so dangerous, and the larger the more dangerous they are, is the inherent lack of accountability they offer to those imbedded in them.  You know what I mean.  Those of you in the military have seen it time after time.  Someone screws up in a way that, in the private sector, would get them escorted out the door but instead there’s, magically, a new “special assistant” at headquarters or they’re simply moved to another division.  Bureaucrats, like liberals, never think they’re wrong, they just think they’re smarter than the rest of us and we just haven’t embraced their brilliance and tried hard enough.  Sadly the power they yield, or they think they yield, can destroy lives and organizations and can waste millions of taxpayers dollars with no negative consequences to them.  Here’s an example.

Some years ago my church received a property tax bill in the mail from the City of Pittsburgh for $500.  I’ve been attending the same church since I was born and, since non-profits are tax exempt, we had never paid property taxes.  So I called the city and after an hour of the standard run around, I was finally transferred to someone who could answer my question.  I was told that the tax was being assessed on the value of every square foot of land around the building, including the parking lot, since only the building itself was being used for “religious purposes”.  I argued the point that we had outdoor events for kids and regularly used the parking lot for community outreach but, in the end, I was told, “Don’t bother fighting this, we have lots of lawyers and money and you can’t afford to fight this even though you’d probably win in the end” and then the line went dead.  We’ve been writing a check ever since.  Nameless and faceless, bureaucracies never shrink and have very little motivation to become more efficient.

The difference between the private sector and the government is that, in the government, there are no consequences for failure and failure often gets you a bigger budget.  A friend of mine ran an organization that did summer tutoring for thousands of inner city kids on a shoestring budget using college kids who stayed, for free, with local families.  When the City of Pittsburgh schools saw the enormous impact the program was having they tried to shut it down by denying access to city facilities. They then rented office space, bought  furniture and hired staff to duplicate the program.  After 2 years and millions of dollars spent they gave up.  They never tutored a single child.

And that brings us back to 405.  The Air Force was willing to throw away the 10s of millions of dollars the 911th saves the budget over other bases  because there are still bureaucrats in the system who, like petulant children,  are enraged that they can’t have their way.  Even in the face of the facts and the law they continue to waste time and resources on a failed, inaccurate paradigm.  Sadly, even with the announcement several weeks ago, they won’t let go.  A friend, whose name I won’t mention, was talking to a counterpart at HHQ after the announcement last week and was told, “Just because you escaped again doesn’t mean the crosshairs aren’t still on the 911th.  It just means we haven’t hit the target yet”.

“Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat denied”  Deep pockets, no accountability and a long memory.  Just wait until they control your healthcare.